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Too much

There's a lot going on, as usual. But I'm too tired, as usual. I'm about to go to bed, but I need to jot down the fact that last night's dream was fucking disturbing. It was the first reckoning I've had with the fact that when I encounter people who are 18, I'm 20 years older than they are. I can't even write down all the details, it was just blurg. I think it's just from how tired I was from saturday. I was up at 630am, and didn't get home till after 10pm and it was just a lot. Another point of the dream was that I could still do it. I could still connect with the 18 year old, but it was some sort of deep betrayal to my entire family. Really weird. I could feel my heart pounding in the dream. I dunno. I'll do more fill in later.

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